Illinois vet Dr John Murray, a hospice specialist, shared ten key tips on pet euthanasia
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Saying goodbye to a beloved pet is one of the most difficult experiences for any animal lover. While we wish our furry friends could live forever, the reality is that our lifespans far exceed theirs, and one day we must let them go.
For many pets, that farewell comes at the vet, where they are quietly and peacefully put to sleep. Though undeniably heartbreaking, euthanasia is often the kindest way to end a suffering animal’s life.
Illinois-based Dr John Murray, a hospice veterinarian who helps families navigate these difficult goodbyes, has shared ten things he wants pet owners to know about the process. Murray outlined the list on TikTok, where he has more than 16,000 followers.
Dr Murray said the hardest part for most pet owners is not deciding whether to euthanise a pet, but when. Timing, he explained, is crucial. He highlighted that a pet still eating food is not necessarily a sign of good quality of life, adding: “Pain, anxiety, confusion, and mobility matter just as much.” Waiting for pets to “tell you” can mean waiting for a crisis, he warned, noting that many animals decline slowly until a sudden deterioration occurs, Mirror reports.
He also emphasised that allowing pets to pass away naturally is not always peaceful. “I have seen far more traumatic ‘natural’ passings than gentle ones,” he said, adding: “Emergency goodbyes at 2am are rarely how families hoped it would happen.”
Many owners have later told him they regretted waiting too long to provide their pets with peace. “I have never had one tell me they wish they had waited for more suffering,” Murray said. He also spoke about the guilt owners feel, saying: “Guilt is loud. But love is quieter, steadier, and braver.”
Dr Murray says the hardest part is knowing when to euthanise, focusing on comfort, not length of life, and that choosing peace is an act of love.(Image: Getty Images)
The vet urged owners not to measure a pet’s life by its length. “Your pet does not measure their life in months gained,” he said. “They measure it in comfort and security.”
He also stressed that choosing euthanasia is not giving up. “It is stepping in so suffering does not get the final word,” he said. “The hardest decisions are often the most loving ones.”
For those facing this choice, Murray said: “If you are in this space right now, I know how heavy it feels. There is no perfect day. There is only a decision made with love, information, and the intention to protect them. And that is enough.”
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Dr Murray’s 10 points on pet euthanasia
Saying goodbye to a pet is never easy, and euthanasia is often the gentlest way to prevent their suffering.(Image: Getty Images)
Most people struggle with when, not whether. Timing is everything.A pet still eating is not a full quality-of-life assessment. Pain, anxiety, confusion, and mobility are equally important.Waiting for a pet to “tell you” can result in a crisis. Many pets decline gradually… until they don’t.Natural passing is not always peaceful. Traumatic experiences are common.Emergency goodbyes at 2am rarely go as families hope.Many owners feel they waited too long, but none regret giving peace early.Guilt is loud, but love is quieter, steadier, and braver.Pets measure their life in comfort and security, not months gained.Choosing euthanasia is not giving up; it ensures suffering does not have the final word.The hardest decisions are often the most loving.
Pet owners responded to Murray’s advice with personal experiences. One urged, “I will add one… don’t leave the room! They need you more than ever in their last moments! I don’t care how hard it is, you stay!”
Another wrote: “I will never understand this. I held my boy until the end, he fell asleep in my arms and knew he was loved to the very last second.”
One owner shared relief years after their pet’s passing: “I lost my golden retriever in 2023. He was 13.5 and was ready. I debated. I said goodbye. I felt enormous guilt. This post has given me the most relief I’ve felt in over two years.”
Others reflected on the difficulty of letting go, with one summarising: “If I do it earlier, I suffer. If I do it later, we both suffer,” and another adding: “This is by far the worst part of having a pet. Don’t let their last day be their worst day.”
